To The Death

Throttle, crush, smash, just
Nonstop devastation and
Cruelty abound.

I will make you so
Sorry that you ever crossed
Me. Choke you to death.

Rip your snide little
Grin right off your fucking face.
Struggle and suffer.

Burn in agony.
I hope you die blue in the
Face, gasping for breath.

I am pitiless.
They have pitted us against
Each other. Only

One can arise from
This pit, and it’s going to
Be me. No mercy.

Mutant Freak

I have always been

A mutant freak, different

From the norm, and now

You see it, and you

Watch for my horns to grow. You’re

Sure I’m just waiting

For the other shoe

To drop, to flee and fly from

You, join my freaky

Friends. I reassure

You, that I don’t have any

Friends; you are my home.

I have nowhere to

Fly, and I cannot picture

Life without you there.

Better

Can you do better?

What it would cost me, how could

I justify that?

Live with myself when

I’ve caused so much pain to those

I love the most? But

Must I choose between

Expressing my truth, being

My authentic self,

And watching my kids

Raised by someone else? Tension

Is killing me slow.

Burnout

You’d think becoming

A doctor would lead to my

Deep fulfillment, an

Intersection of

My gifts and the world’s needs.

No. It’s all band-aids.

I save a life and

Forget it, beat my head on

The wall when I don’t

Know an answer. It’s

Ashes in my mouth. Reward

For years of struggle

Is to be beset

By insoluble problems.

I long for music,

Peace, rest, safety, an

End to toil and turmoil.

Sabbath of Sabbaths.

Stupid

There’s a dunce cap I
Wear every day, sometimes I
See it, and realize

Why everyone laughs
At me. I struggle to put on don
The jester’s hat so

I can laugh with them.
Then I forget, and assume
It’s a mortarboard.

Angel in Chains

You enticed me here

With promises of talent

Fulfilled, potential


Realized. Service and

A community of like

Minds. Then you locked me


In a sewer, to

Twist and writhe as you giggle

At my agony.


I can’t free myself.

No rescuer waits in the

Wings. If I want a

Miracle, Deus

Ex Machina, it will have

To come from my heart.

Double Bind

It isn’t what it

Is, and it’s not what it is

Not. Nothing and all.

If you want it, it’s

Wrong. If you avoid it, it

Finds you anyway.

There is a perfect

Circle, and you are a point

On a distant plane.

When you’re right, you’re wrong.

When you’re wrong, you’re dead wrong. But

Keep on trying, friend.