I’d rather be a
Asshole, Motherfucker, than
A wee weak willed worm.
Given the Choice
Tag: humor
Who, Me?
My perversity
Is only curiosity
I am quite wholesome
Dumbass
Whenever I say
Something really stupid I
Smile wide because I
Probably just spoke
The truth for the first time in
A really long time.
Snared
Blindly blundered I
Through life and love and now am
Bound forevermore.
A Better Class of Fiend
I am tired of
These drug addicts. I want to
Be with addicts of
The type of drugs which
I am addicted to. They
Are far more urbane.
My Self Talk
The part of me that says, “I wish I’d never been born,”
I’m teaching to say, “I wish my hair had never been shorn.”
That said, “I wish I was dead,” to say, “I wish I had dreads.”
That says, “I should just kill myself,” to say,
“I should just thrill myself. Thrill everybody.”
Nick at Nite and the Occult
Just struck by how many old TV shows on Nick at Nite when I was a kid had strange occult premises.
Mr. Ed: a foolish young man and his familiar, a horse
I Dream of Jeannie: astronaut marries a succubus
Bewitched: man married undead crone
My Mother, the Car: haunted automobile harasses bereaved son, impersonating his mother
The Flying Nun: levitation proves problematic for a novice nun
Stupid
There’s a dunce cap I
Wear every day, sometimes I
See it, and realize
Why everyone laughs
At me. I struggle to put on don
The jester’s hat so
I can laugh with them.
Then I forget, and assume
It’s a mortarboard.
Again and Again
I feel like Charlie
Fucking Brown, astonished when
Shitty people do
Shitty things. I thought
My expectations were low
Enough, but Surprise!
