I would not, could not
In the butt, I would not, could
Not, for it is shut.
A finger in my
Ass, you say? No finger will
Enter me today.
A leather ball gag
Is not for me; even if
You say I’m a drag.

These proclivities
Which you suggest are simply
Not my cup of tea.
Try it and I may,
You say? Very well. Only
To please you. Okay.
Say! This isn’t so
Bad. I rather like it in
The butt! You can go
Further, if you want!
Faster, faster, go, go, go!
Wow! What a jaunt!
I do so like it
In the ass! Perhaps I’ll try
That ball gag! Don’t quit!

You are a wise man,
I can see, humane, thank you,
Thank you, Sam I Am.
(Illustrations from Dr. Seuss’ The Seven Lady Godivas)